For at least a 100-years, women have been fighting to win equality in the home, workplace and the world at large. Although not fully achieved yet (especially in less developed countries), there has never been a time when we have seen more liberated and independent women.

The changes this emancipation brings can prove difficult for some men to contend with; their traditional role as breadwinner is diminishing, while their role as homemaker is increasing. This brings new challenges and men can react in different ways: some become more overtly chauvinist; others take no notice and continue on, hoping it will all work out, somehow; many do not know how to respond, flounder, and feel lost; and some try to embrace it by adopting more feminine traits in their character.

Negating the extremes of the Neanderthal and the Metrosexual, we seek to explore these challenges for men today, offering a middle ground that is: The Complete Gentleman. Charming, intelligent, caring, practical, social, clean, fit, helpful, adventurous, learned…the list is plentiful.

Our Mission: to help construct a complete gentleman for our times.

Not sure if this applies to you? Check out these statistics (they are USA based but follow a similar pattern found in most developed countries), which help to outline the (often deconstructive) nature of men:

80% of people with alcohol dependency are male; over 70% with cannabis addiction are male and 70% of overall illegal drug abusers are male. Over 80% of pornography addicts are men and, up to 80 % of gambling is undertaken by men, spending an average of $3,750 per year. Men are 4 times more likely to be addicted to video gaming and it is estimated they spend an average of 13 hours per week playing them. Did you know? It is believed a male has already spent an average of 10,000 hours playing video games by the time they are 21 (find out about the 10,000-Hour Rule for learning).

“I admire anyone who rids himself of an addiction.”

– Gene Tierney.

Males commit more crime and are thus 9 times more likely to be incarcerated than females (this increases significantly if you are also from African American or Hispanic backgrounds). Did you know: men carry out 90% of all homicides, and 75% of homicide victims are male?

“One way to make sure crime doesn’t pay would be to let the government run it.”

– Ronald Regan.

Over 50% of men admit to drinking and driving, and 80% of all driving under the influence (DUI) offenses are committed by males. Males are more reckless drivers, have more motor vehicle accidents and are10% less likely to wear a seat belt. This type of attitude may be replicated in other areas of life and could account for men being twice as likely to die from accidents than women. Did you know? While men may account for 50% of the workforce, they are represented by over 90% of the accidental deaths at work.

“Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower then you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac?”

– George Carlin.

Around 70% of students obtaining grades below a “C” are gained by males, and about two thirds of all students in “Special Education Programs” are male. It is no wonder more young men drop out of schooling compared with females, with only 40% going on to enroll at college, and of these, only 60% attaining a degree. Did you know? Women achieve around 25% more Bachelor and Master degrees than men.

“We don’t need no education.”

– From “The Wall” by Pink Floyd.

Early on we are likely to gain many of our moral values from our parents, and as we mature this can be supported by any spiritual beliefs we find (and the moral teachings this may provide). In the US 40% of men say they are actively committed Christians however, less than 10% of men participate in any formal spiritual group (i.e. a religion). Overall, the number of people attending church has been declining and many believe this brings about a moral decline too. Whatever the reasons, people seem to generally agree that we are all in need of better moral guidance and development.

“Just as a candle cannot burn without fire, men cannot live without a spiritual life.”

– Buddha.

Only about 15% of males are fit, compared to the 70% who believe they are. Around a third of males are obese with up to 70% likely to become obese at some point in their lives. 50% of all males will have cancer during their lifespan and heart disease accounts for a quarter of all male deaths - suddenly it’s no wonder we have up to 10% lower life expectancy than females. Did you know? 70% of men, especially in early adulthood to middle age, are less likely to visit a doctor when needing treatment – seeking to “tough it out” instead.

"Take care of your body. It’s the only place you have to live.”

– Jim Rohn.

Bachelorhood

50% of people aged 18 – 24 and 30% of people aged 25 – 34 live at home with their parents. Males in this age range (18 – 34) are twice as likely to live at home with their parents then females. In the last 40 years the number of men aged 40 – 44 who have never been married has risen from just over 5% to nearly 20%.

Marriage

60 years ago around 80% of households consisted of married couples, but today this number is down to about 50%. Men used to marry in their early 20’s but this has now increased to an average age of 27.

Divorce

The divorce rate during the 1970’s & 80’s rose to around 50% but this has since declined to about a third. Although this does need to be compared against the overall decline in marriage, it could be a sign of the increasing maturity of age in marriage.

Single Parents

Over 65% of children grow up without their biological father and over a third of children live without a father. Children from this background are 5 times more likely to live in poverty, often have poor education records and have greater levels of emotional related issues. Did you know? Up to 80% of incarcerated males come from fatherless homes.

Domestics

50 years ago males spent about 10 hours per week on domestic chores (taking children to an activity, changing diapers, washing, cleaning etc.), this has now increased to nearly 20 hours per week. Meanwhile, women who used to spend 40 hours per week on domestic chores now spend an average of 30 hours. In the last 20 years, the number of stay-at-home fathers have increased 10 times to around half a million.

“Home is where the heart is.”

– Pliny the Elder.

It is often cited women speak about 7,000 words a day, while a man speaks about 2,000. If true, this may account for women having around 20% more friends. Regardless of the science or statistics, it is observable at parties and other social gatherings where men tend to be less socially adept, with limited small talk. Even online, this seems to be borne out, where women make more connections with other people. Now, more than ever, social connections appear to be the lifeblood of the future.

“In the social jungle of human existence, there is no feeling of being alive without a sense of identity.”

– Erik Erikson.

Males between the ages of 16 – 24 (sometimes called “the testosterone years”) are 4 times more likely to commit suicide compared with females of the same age. Males carry out over 75% of all suicides, with spikes for young adults (aged 16 – 24) and older adults (aged 75+). Did you know? With men 5 times more likely to own a firearm it is not surprising to find guns are the most common method for a male to dispatch one’s self.

“Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem.”

– Phil Donahue.

Men have up to 20 times more of the hormone testosterone in their bodies than women. According to many studies these higher levels are responsible for making men more aggressive, competitive, domineering, assertive and self reliant. This often displays itself as “fearlessness” and may account for men being prone to taking more risks.

Did you know?  The male brain is on average 10% bigger than a female, but this does not make them any more intelligent, it is because males tend to be at least 10% bigger than females and require this extra processing power to compensate for their larger size. However, The Amygdala (a part of the brain responsible for memory, decision making and emotional reactions) is, after allowing for the difference in body size, 10% larger in men than women. This, coupled with the testosterone, may account for the higher level of angry emotional outbursts (seeing “red”) often displayed by men.

“So, if anatomy is destiny then testosterone is doom.”

– Al Goldstein.

At worst, a man can readily be: addicted to negative vices, likely to commit a crime, reckless in nature, accident prone, less social, unhealthy, suicidal and uncontrollably angry (many of which can result in a lower life expectancy too). Couple this with a man of today being less likely to marry, less educated and lacking a moral compass and things look bleak.

Certainly we have sought to paint the blackest picture possible but; it gives a snapshot of the potential future for men, unless there is a greater level of intervention. We need to be more conscious of where we are going and plan to make it the best journey possible, not just for ourselves but those around us. The question for each one of us is: what am I choosing to do about it?

“You cannot feed the hungry on statistics.”

- Heinrich Heine.